Fight!

A person I know recently shared some information about another person I know. The information was specifically meant to communicate the accused person’s unworthiness of being in leadership or connected to leadership. The accused person’s mistake was well over ten years ago and has been very public. They were accused, took their punishment, and to the best of my knowledge, have not repeated this mistake since.

I make mistakes. Some of my mistakes have taken years to process. As much as I wish for its existence, real life doesn’t have an undo button. 

I have to live with my mistakes, and I hope others forgive me. I hope I forgive me.

What I’ve done is different than what others have. What I’ve done is maybe the same as you and maybe different. Our circumstances and tools are all different. 

My point isn’t to debate moral elitism. I’m processing at what point our younger self’s mistakes become a stepping stone in our character development and whether continued accusations and reminders of past infractions creates a world of healing or a world of hiding.

Guilt and shame can come from a feeling of unworthiness—often on the shoulders of personally-unforgiven mistakes.

Hearing other people I know shaming other people I know makes the world feel less safe for personal and societal growth. If the world hurls stones at others for their past mistakes, I’m afraid for the future of vulnerability and honesty in those who have not dealt with their own demons.

I’m afraid for my boys. 
I know they’ll make mistakes.
They might make BIG mistakes.

I want them to be okay with themselves after they’ve apologized and gone through the painful process of self-forgiveness for whatever they do. I want them to admit when they’ve done wrong and not feel forced to hide it. I want that for them, for me, and for you.

I don’t want the world to pretend it hasn’t made mistakes by hurling stones at others. I can’t stop it and know I won’t be able to. But maybe, at times, it would be good to speak up and let vulnerability kick self-righteousness’s ass.